Day old Fishes, Fish of the Day

icing

2008-02-08T12:25:00.001-08:00

Corey's Last Hurrah

2007-09-21T14:56:00.000-07:00

My friend Corey will be having his second child on Wednesday, so last night Bad Jimmy and I took him out. Of course being the old men that we are, the night was pretty tame.

We started off at Hooter's, instead of watching the girls, we mainly discussed geek stuff and watched the football game. We also discussed whether we were going to go someplace afterward or just call it a night since we were old wusses. We decided on making a quick stop by Perfect 10, well $200 and 20 lap dances later we were having a great time. Just kidding, we ended up mainly discussing geek stuff. Corey was the only one to get a lap dance. One stripper came up and talked to me, she was pretty and all, during the conversation she mentioned that she has a kid, well that is always a turnoff from a stripper. It actually turns out she has six kids and wants more (major turnoff). Well Corey and her discussed baby stuff for about an hour.

After we left, I was driving Corey home and we of course had to have one more drink. So it was off to Canary Roost, where shots and beers were consumed. We also had the opportunity to meet the owner of the Canary empire. Then we decided to drunk dial Trevor, turns out he was actually in Austin, so he and Julian met us at Corey's house. Where we continued drinking till Corey passed out. Then Julian, Trevor and I went in search of Breakfast, which was kind of a pain in the ass, two kolache places and a pancake house were not open at 5:00. We finally decided on a Donut shop. At some point they dropped me off at Corey's where I passed out.
This morning I woke up with a killer hangover, Corey did not even notice me on his couch when he went to work, I about gave his wife a heart attack when I woke up and she was in the kitchen.
Oh what a tame life I lead.

Kiss my converse

2007-09-06T17:29:00.001-07:00

Am I the meanest?
Sho'nuff.

Am I the prettiest?
Sho'nuff.

Am I the baddest, mo-fo, low-down, around this town?
Sho'nuff'

Well, who am I?
Sho'nuff.

Who am I?
Sho'nuff.

I can't hear you.
Sho'nuff'

The Shogun of Harlem!

Here I am

2007-09-06T16:47:00.000-07:00

I have not been writing for quite a while, reason being, I have not been bored at work. For that matter I have not been at work. Well now I am back.

Well, what should we discuss? The house warming party was a huge success! What should have been a few hours of swilling wine turned into drinking till 3 am. And there were only a few hashers there, my non-hasher friends are crazy.

There have been many parties over the past few months, the only highlight I can think of is a couple of weeks ago I was so drunk, I fell in my bushes while trying to unlock the door. Thanks for the ride home Head Banger.

Brownie was in town this past weekend. Over course we were at the Barfly, getting royally hammered with Squeaky Cheeks, Two drinks away from my sister, Pornoratti and Just Head. The drinking lasted quite late, Brownie was the first to pass out, Then Cheeks, then Head and lastly me.

The next morning, Brownie had set his alarm for 5. I could here it in the living room, went and tried to wake him up, but it was useless. Since I was up, I went home, where I tried to get some sleep before having to help Alisa move. While moving, totally fucked up my right ankle.

well that is all for now

On-On to Happy Hour

MIA

2007-07-11T08:04:00.000-07:00

Some of you maybe wondering why I have not been posting lately. The answer is quite simple, when I am at home, I have been working on unpacking since the move. When I am at work, I am either really busy or reading (since I don't read at home anymore and I really need the escapism reading provides). The only reason I am posting today, is I forgot to bring a book to work today.
Well back to work.

btw, I had a great birthday celebration. Thanks to everyone who attended.

Part Two

2007-05-17T15:11:00.000-07:00

The intervention went quite welll, I was back to my old self, hanging out at the local dives, introducing myself to the new bartenders and trying to score with all the hotties.
Shortly after the intervention though, i received a call from a friend, one of my drinking buddies. She bribes me with a pedicure (seriously not gay, nothing better than having a hot asian chic give you a foot massage while you swill hooch), what is the trade off on this bribe? Keep her company while she is dragged off to church by a mutual friend.
When I entered the church, there was a slight burning sensation, had not felt this way since the last time I was in a church. As we entered, I hear singing, electric guitars, drums, bongos, the whole shebang. "Oh, great it's one of those churches!" We take our seats and the person who took us hostage for the evening tells us that since it is a Wednesday, there will be no preaching, "LIAR!!!!" They sang for an hour, then the preaching began. An hour later it was over, I was pale and shaking. I looked like a heroin addict on his third day of rehab. What made it worse, was there is a singles weekend coming up and my two friends are trying to sign me up. Groan! Sure the girls there were hot, but I really don't want to have the Jesus talk with them
During the trip to Chon Som, I was pretty quiet, later as I entered, there were several hashers to see how my church experience was. All I could say was, "Jesus can't go hashing because he is nailed to the cross! Free beer to all the hashers, free beer to all the hashers. Free beer for all the hashers. Jesus saves, Jesus saves, Jesus saves." Then I yelled for Justin to bring me a Lonestar.
Guess church wouldn't be so bad, if you took out the preaching, the people saying amen and getting down on their knees to praise something, the women crying. Pretty much if you left it with the music and the hotties, plus added some booze, it wouldn't be a bad time.

By the way, most of this part of the story is true.

Intervention

2007-04-30T23:34:00.000-07:00

I never thought things would get so bad that I would need an intervention, but tonight when I arrived home the first thing I saw was a priest. SHIT! Then I recognized who was throwing the intervention, several bartenders I knew very well. Next thing I know, I am tackled by the priest, who is slinging Jager around like it is holy water. "The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you. Come on Tim, Jesus was a party guy, he threw bashes all the time, you know the whole water into wine thing. Of course he can't go hashing because he changes the beer to wine, but hey other than that he was an okay guy." Brian, from the Hideout, comes up and starts funneling Tuaca down my throat. Joe, from Grafitti's (I know it closed, but this is my weird day dream damn it) starts shoveling Jello shots my way. From out of no where, Slut shows up and say, "Mi compadre, walk away from the light. Come back to the Dark Side." He tossed me a Miller Lite and ...

To be continued on the next episode of
The Young and the Hashers

Test about me

2007-04-09T21:26:00.000-07:00

Create your own Friend Quiz here

Possible Hash Song?

2007-04-05T16:17:00.000-07:00

Robert Burns

Johnie Lad, Cock Up Your Beaver

1791

When first my brave Johnie lad came to this town,
He had a blue bonnet that wanted the crown;
But now he has gotten a hat and a feather,
Hey, brave Johnie lad, cock up your beaver!

Cock up your beaver, and cock it fu' sprush,
We'll over the border, and gie them a brush;
There's somebody there we'll teach better behaviour,
Hey, brave Johnie lad, cock up your beaver!

Severely bored today so went through some books from grad school and came across this.

Friday Night House Warming

2007-04-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

On Friday, I attended a house warming at my friends Robin and Brinda's new home. like so may other times in my life, I have been the only white boy in the house. But what can I say, I love Indian food and Robin is a giid friend of mine. Some of you may remember Robin from when he hashed, the most memorable moment would be him diving off the party barge and dislocating both his shoulders. What makes it worse, he was the only one not drinking that day. The party was a good time, plenty of beer was flowing, Robin even had some Lonestar.

Here are a couple of pics.

Testicle comercial

2007-03-29T15:33:00.000-07:00

Last night while driving home, I heard a testicular cancer commercial. Now testicular cancer is a serious subject, but this psa was performed completely wrong.

"Dude! What are you doing?"
"I am checking for testicular cancer"
"Seriously what are you doing?"
"Checking for cancer."
"How do you do that?"
"You grip one testicle and move it around feeling for lumps, then you do the other."
"Now I am glad I know how to check."

So what is disturbing about this commercial, guy walks in and another guy is checking his nads. Even more disturbing is he sticks around and talks to the guy while he is inspecting his nads. This seems pretty weird to me, it really seems like they could have found a better way to get the message across.

Questions, Comments ... Talk Amongst Yourselves,

DOF

Fort Worth 20 years

2007-03-25T14:11:00.000-07:00

As I write this, I am sitting at my sisters house recovering from hanging out with the Fort Worth hashers. I had a blast with them yesterday. Since they hash on Saturday, I am thinking to hash with them more often. Of course if Donnie launches the Brass Monkey hash, I will have to do it every other week. I am very glad I came to this event. I met a lot of Texas hashers I have not previously met, plus it gave me time to hang out with my mom and sister. My only criticism is the trail was extremely short and no shiggy. But I have heard that most Fort Worth trails are usually full of shiggy and really bloody, but still very short by Austin standards. I think I might even hare a trail up here, since I lived here for 10 years prior to moving to Austin,I might be able scout some good locations. Who knows, maybe I can even get my sister hashing, although she may not be a big fan of Jesus Can't Go Hashing. But then again it is a fun song and meant only in jest.

On-Out, Lust received a call saying my ride is on their way, so need to as many jello shots as I can before leaving.

dof

New Website

2007-03-22T15:00:00.000-07:00

Found this new website that helps you find places to eat and has reviews. This is an awesome service for Austin. Check it out Food Hawk. And If you have a favorite place to eat, I would suggest leaving a comment.

I plan on using this site a lot, since there are a lot of places that I eat, that most people do not know about.

On-Out

DOF

Mr. Peabody

2007-03-21T15:47:00.000-07:00

For Someone reason I was thinking about this cartoon today

Memorial Day

2007-03-20T12:55:00.000-07:00

Cum one Cum all

Memorial Day Hash Weekend

2007-03-15T15:58:00.000-07:00

Austin is throwing a hash weekend and I expect you all to come. Friday, dive bar pub run, hared by yours truly. Keep in mind the last time I hared a pub run for an event, I was thrown in a cab by the second bar. Saturday, hashing (maybe a bike hash) and food, possibly a band (if not I will be playing DJ with a few ipods). Sunday will be the normal Austin hash, again hared by me.

This will be an in Austin event, no camping. We do not have a hash hotel as of yet, but a lot of hashers will be opening up there homes for you free loaders (not you Donnie and ESPN, since you let me crash at your place you got a place to stay if you want it, just bring the guac). The .pdf should be posted to the Austin site shortly, I will also post it here.

And to entice you even more, rego is $29.99 or half price for active military.

So what can you expect? Chicken shit bingo, a shirt that will definitely redeem the Austin hash after the gayness of TXIH's shirt last year, good food (Brownie can actually eat it), Some hashing (possibly bashing), good beer, good fun and great trails.

On-On
Day Old Fish

A Murder of Crows

2007-03-08T10:34:00.000-08:00

This is something that has fascinated me for quite a while, Why are a flock of crows called a murder? I will get to that later.

Crows are the most intelligent bird, they use tools. They sharpen twigs to help them forage for larvae and insects. Some studies indicate crows can count and that they have an amazing memory. Crows live in very close knit groups, sometimes in the thousands, to protect themselves. Crows, will defend crows from a different murder and it is thought crows are to mate for life. Crows have 25 distinct calls all with a specifac purpose. One is even a distress call.

So why is a flock of crows called a murder? When a crow is dying, the rest of the flock will kill it. Sounds pretty cruel, but then again, it sounds like euthanasia. I am not necessarily supporting or not supporting euthanasia, just giving everone something to think about from the animal kingdom.

Wow, look what happens when I am sober. I am using my brain again, it all goes downhill from here.

Here something booze related.

A Crow Left of the Murder

2 oz Old Crow® bourbon whiskey
2 oz cranberry juice
2 oz pineapple juice

Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well, strain into a highball glass filled with ice cubes, and serve with a straw.

Todays Beer Bash

2007-03-07T14:55:00.000-08:00

It totally sucked ass. Not because I was not drinking, but the finger foods usually taste better, maybe drinking beer helps. The only other drink they had besides beer was water, like I could not hit up a water cooler on the way. Then the special gift that was announced was a shirt, basically the same shirt they left on our desk last year. So let's see, 10 minutes waiting for bad food, 5 minutes trying to eat said food. 10 minutes waiting for shirt. Disappointment, all day long. Well I cannot really complain, I do work for the best company on the planet. And it is not everyone who gets a beer bash every month or so. I think the next one will totally rock because I will be drinking and I will not be dressed in interview clothes.

Damnit

2007-03-07T10:11:00.000-08:00

The first beer bash at the froot I am able to attend for like the past two years and I am not drinking. Nobody said sobriety would be easy. Plus I told C'em if he saw me with a beer he could punch me.

Crazy Weekend

2007-03-06T15:14:00.000-08:00

If you look at @ss Gaggers pics, you will see how it started. Things only worsened. Friday Pornarotti and I hit an all time high of drinking. Made Yucca at 10 am. Saturday is a blur. Sunday was a sober day even though I was a hare.

Jumping on the wagon for a bit, need to start running in the morning, instead of sleeping off drinking. Also need to make it to work more often. My meds and the hooch did not play well together. From Thursday till Saturday, I was manic again, really missed it, guess that is why it lasted so. By Sunday I hit a depression which I stayed in until Monday evening. This is the reason I am on the wagon for a little bit.

By Monday night, I was back to my old self. Today made it into work, everything was cool here. Did not do much, we had communication meetings most of the day. Tomorrow I have an interview pretty early, so tonight, I am staying in, watching movies and maybe talking to this really cool chic.

On-Out

BTW this does not mean I will stop hashing, just water and soda down downs.

Happy Birthday Elvis!

2007-03-01T09:06:00.000-08:00

Plans for today, hit the roller rink for a little drunken skating. After that a little bar hopping. What an exciting day. If it is like his birthday last year, I will be drunk pretty early. From what he says, he will be wearing a robe all day. Apparently he was at work one day and someone came in wearing nothing but a robe. When asked why was wearing just a robe, the man responded, "It's my birthday." Elvis has been fascinated with wearing a robe on his birthday ever since.

2nd Post in a week

2007-02-28T13:52:00.000-08:00

Since I am posting, it appears I made it to work today. Today has been quite interesting, I received a call and an email from our training group. Seems I applied for some position and I have to interview for it next week. Don't even remember applying, so this should be fun.

At lunch, saw my favorite homeless guy, he had a new sign or one I have not seen before. It said, "I do not suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it." The next interesting thing to happen, when I walked into my favorite Mexican place they had a Spanish version of Jerry Springer. It was hilarious, they would let the people fight a little longer than Springer. The next show was some Spanish dating game based on Zodiac signs, it was quite interesting.

While I was eating, some woman just broke out sobbing, it was quite sad, because it looked as if she and the person she was dining with had just escaped from One Who Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

I wonder what the rest of the day holds for me.

New Post

2007-02-27T13:19:00.000-08:00

So everyone has been saying to post, well here it is. Some of you wonder why I have not been posting much, well the answer is simply, I post while at work. I have been out of the office a lot the past few months, getting used to new schedule and new meds. Yeh I love being bipolar.

I will start off slow, while driving back to work today, I heard Don't Fear the Reeper. All I have to say is, "MORE COWBELL!"
Lunch was at one of my usual spots, cannot spell the name so won't even try. All I have to say is it is near Chon Som and the salsa verde rocks.

So what is new in my life. I have been seeing someone, I have not rushed in and asked her to marry me, like I have in the past. Actually we are kind of taking things slow, things are not even defined. We have no plans for the future, I think once we stop having fun with each other, things will be over, I don't see that happening anytime soon, because I have a blast with her.

The last thing I would like to say is this weekend is the Second Annual Chuck Norris Hash! Hares C'em Cummin, Strap-on Elvis, She Mussel Bitch and of course myself. I will try to get the artwork converted to jpeg and uploaded today. This hash rocked last year and this year will be even better.

Okay, could not find the artwork, only the top 10 list and cannot release that info till the day of the hash.

Brownie is a Wanker who eats Poo

New Restaraunts

2007-02-13T10:49:00.000-08:00

I've been feeling a little under the weather the past couple of days, so today I decided to go and have some Pho, I tried out a new place, Lemon Grass Cafe. This place was really good, I was fairly surprised. It is located in a spot where many Pho places have died. The food was excellent, had some dishes I have not seen since leaving Fort Worth, they served egg rolls the traditional way with lettuce to wrap them in, plus they have fresh fruit smoothies with tapioca pearls.

The decor is very modern and warm, much like Chon Som. I am definitely going to make this my new place for Pho and other Vietnamese dishes. I have never thought of taking a date to a Vietnamese place, but since finding Lemon Grass, it is a definite possibility.

On the way home, I took a look at Don Luis a new taco place, which also sits in a doomed location. The parking lot was packed, which is great, this place is also a great addition to the North Austin food scene. Bad Jimmy and I stopped in on Saturday, between the two of us, we tried about 5 different types of tacos. The quality is much higher than Taco Deli and the tacos are about $1.25 to $2.50 cheaper.

I give both these restaurants a big thumbs up. Both places have put in for a liquor license. Don Luis will actually give you a beer if you tip them before hand.

If anyone has a place they would like me to review, please post. Or if you are scared to try a new place, I can tag along.

Well off to bed and dreaming of my next culinary adventure.

I feel like I should post.

2007-02-06T14:48:00.000-08:00

Don't really have all that much to say.
Mad Cowboys were great on Friday.
It was good to hang out with Corey and Bad Jimmy on Saturday.
Todd (Crotch Rot's) bday celebration was fun, but at the same time made a lot of us sad, does not seem like has been gone that long.
Superbowl and hot tubbing, excellent!

Prizes from the weekend include a Miller Lite inflatable chair, a Grey Goose hat and a Jager shirt.

I am really happy my schedule changes at the end of this week, I will have a more normal schedule, Monday-Friday 10:30-7:30. Hopefully all those jokes about me never working will go away, I doubt it.

My sisters birthday is tomorrow, I wish I could be at home and bully her into going out to whatever place I would like to eat. Mmmmm, some tortilla soup from Benito's.

Well I have posted and yet I feel I have accomplished nothing.

For you hashers check out Showerheads blog, she has a little homework for you guys.

On-On
DOF

All I need to be complete

2007-01-23T09:52:00.000-08:00

Is a stuffed Moosehead. The other night, after watching You, Me and Dupree, I figured that out. So if anyone spots one tell me!

So people have been asking what happened with the challenge. We all won, or lost since we went that time without drinking and had nothing to show. When the bet was over, thanks to bad weather, a few of us went on a four day bender, well not a real bender, but it got so bad that at one point Peter had been in the same bar for 12 hours, I think I was there for 10.5 or 11.

The official Grand opening of Chon Som has come and gone. It was a great night with wonderful food, great friends and excellent scotch. I went with the thai menu that night, it really was some of the best they had to offer from the menu. I am really proud of my Asians for what they have accomplished, I am also proud of all of you who helped out.

Last night, met up with some friends and went to downtown. Have not hit up 6th St since Sphincter Blinkers bday. I really hate the downtown scene, but have to love $1 beer and $2 shots. We were only down there a couple of hours, we were showing a friend around before she had to catch a flight back to NYC.

Well I am off, Maybe I will hash this weekend, then again I have never been a 6 week wanker. Also, I have been having a craving for Schlitz, Pickled Eggs, Dale Watson and his Lonestars, you guessed it Chicken Shit Bingo at Ginny's. T Rex invited me on Sunday, but never made it out.

On-On to Happy Hour, there has to be one somewhere at noon.

Temptation

2007-01-09T17:51:00.000-08:00

Haring the Shoal Creek Crawlers on Wednesday. What is frightening, I will be doing it sober, worse yet a sober circle. Hopefully that spectacle of me sober will get some people out to do a mid-week trail. I really enjoy the Crawlers and wish we would do it more often, so a good turn out may help.

On-On to Betty Ford and not the good one that hashers attend

Oh yeah, as far as the bet goes I am still master of my domain.

The Challenge

2007-01-05T22:59:00.000-08:00

Okay...we are coming up with the latest plan.

Bad Jimmy, Free Meat, I Pee Freely, and Day Old Fish....

....$50 each person

Challenge: Monday 12:01 a.m. - Saturday 8 p.m. no drinking

Who will win? Who will lose? Can we do it?

Stay tuned

Last Night

2007-01-05T09:37:00.000-08:00

Last night's Full Moon rocked, The Tour de Margarita. The group was small, Wanksgiving, @ss Gagger, (Massive Slutslinger, Bad Jimmy (his first time to actually to do trail and he was still dressed for work), Big Bloody Ketchup, Free Meat and our hare was blASSt Zone. It was a picture hash that took us by several mexican places for margarita's, the On-In was at blASSt Zone's house for cheap tequila and beer. Cumoniwannaleiya made an appearance, of course it is her house too.

Circle was fun and quite entertaining.

Afterwards, Free Meat, Bad Jimmy and myself head to Grafitti's for one beer. IT WAS CLOSED, then on to Raggedy Anne's where we were later joined by Peter (a Chon Som regular who appears to be hash material) and Trey (one of the servers at Chon Som). After three pitchers of beer, it appeared that there was no stopping this crowd, so for once I took my leave early. Went home, ate, prepared for today and was in bed by midnight.

Tonights agenda, go to Chon Som and work on the Grand Opening plans and then probably another early night.

For those members of Team Brass Monkey going to Tex/Mex this weekend, my radio fortold a great weekend, heard Hall and Oates on the way into work.

Where have I been?

2007-01-03T22:46:00.000-08:00

I have spent most of the past few weeks hanging out with the other members of the Four Horsemen of the Apocolypse, Free Meat, Bad Jimmy and Corey. There have been many nights and days of chaos. What do I have to show for it, my car is dented (someone hit and ran) and a drained bank account. We had many adventures, I am not going to go through them all, but I will tell you the tale of The Prostrate.

One Saturday Bad Jimmy, Free Meat and myself met to have lunch. Of course lunch included a few Margaritas. Once finished with lunch, we start driving up Burnet heading home. Well all Austinites know you can't drive up Burnet without stopping into Ginny's. We walk in with nothing but pocket change, Ginny's is cash only so we just pooled our loose change. We order a round, we make friends with one of the locals who then buys a round.

After Ginny's, we go to the Poodle Dog. While at Poodle Dog, I was told to call Corey since both Free Meat's and Bad Jimmy's phones had died (We had been texting and calling Corey all day since he was in the dog house with his wife over the events the night before). When I call Corey, I pretend that I am his Doctors office and that he needs to come back in for another prostate exam (he had his first ever earlier in the week {well there was that one time in jail, but if someone spoons you afterward, that is not the right type of exam}). While I am talking to Corey, I go into graphic detail about what we are going to have to. After I ramble on for a couple of minutes, the person interupts me and it is not Corey. I pass the phone to free meat who apologizes. After she hangs up, she decides it is best to call the guy back and apologize. The guy did not appreciate her effort.

Next stop LaLa's, the Free Meat's house, where she is in the dog house with I Pee Freely.

I will try to post more often, but have been kind of blah lately.

Update

2006-12-18T14:24:00.000-08:00

Sorry I have not been posting lately not much excitement going on the past few weeks. There is only so many times I could say, went to work then to Chon Som.

The Hash Holiday party has come and pass, I was pretty shitty that night.

Recent events, Thursday was the 12 oz Xmas card. A tradition started by our friend Todd (Crotch Rot). In past years, this has always been one of the drunkest nights of the year for me. This year I took it easy, mainly because I had bronchitis and a sinus infection.

Friday was the Merry Martinimas party at the Hovii (Great Dane Pain), I usually take it easy at their events, but this year I was overcome by chocolate whiskey, good times. Needless to say I slept in one of their guest rooms.

Saturday was Jug Tuggers birthday party, I skipped it because I thought I needed some rest. I should have went to the party, because I partied really hard during my "rest". Went to Chon Som for dinner and to meet Cornholio and Divine Bovine. After several drinks we head over to Grafitti's with Bitch, James Bitch, Hippie Swallow, Free Meat, I Pee Freely and some of the CS staff. We closed G's down and then go to Raggedy Anne's, where at some point Cornholio and our friend Carlos almost get into a fight. That kind of killed the buzz for the evening, plus all the bars were closed, only thing to do is head home and pass out.

Sunday is a hashing day, well not for me. I opted to go sailing instead with the Rich's and blASSt Zone, it was totally what I needed, to be out in the sun. Weather was perfect and we almost beat the record for speed on Infinity, maybe next time. After sailing I went to CS and pretty much closed the place down, FM was on one of her 1 more drink kicks and we were there pretty late.

Tonight I am scouting trail, which means I will probably be at CS drinking with FM, we hare this weekend and still need to map trail out.

So there's my update, more stuff to come soon, just because there are a lot of things happening.

Quote of the Day

2006-12-01T21:27:00.000-08:00

Hey Fucko, we like to call interspecies erotica.

New Puzzle

2006-11-20T10:35:00.000-08:00

This puzzle will consume your soul. Not really, I already solved it, but it is fun.

Yesterdays Trail

2006-11-20T08:49:00.000-08:00

First trail of the new Junta year and I am recruited to lay trail. Well, as usual things did not go as planned. Death By Dildo emailed me last Wednesday to remind me of when we are laying trail, like I will remember something I read on Wedesday on Sunday. Sunday morning, I wake up about 8:30 and realize that no one has called me to say when we are laying Trail, so I figure time to go back to sleep. 11:30 rolls around, I call Tuck It Up the Butt, who is doing the food portion of the hash, to find out what is going on. He said they were laying trail and that I had to come over immediately and start drinking with him. Never one to disappoint a cohare, I quickly jet over to his point and proceed to drinking and tasting the yummy Venison Chili he made.
Trail time rolled around, from what I understand it was a pretty good trail. During circle, i was called out multiple times for being a hare, for being me and for incoming and outgoing members of the Junta. At one point High Beams brings out a bottle of hot sex for the outgoing junta, of course everyone was like Fish finish it, never one to disappoint my fans, I killed the bottle.
The On-On-On was held at The Black Dog Pub, I had never been there before and it turned out to be a nice little bar. She Mussel Bitch bought me a couple of shots of Jager, which I greatly appreciated, but most likely did not need at that point.

While having a few drinks, who do I see come in, one of my favorite bartenders, Mia. Turns out she is the GM of the pub, going to have to put this into my regular bar rotation since I have had a crush on that girl for like 3 years. I of course have her make me a Miatini, really did not need this. After talking to Mia for a while, I realize I am the last hasher there. At this point at start my trek to Chon Som, I walk in order a beer, take one sip and proceed to pass out on the couch. True classic form. Don't know how long I was out, but I am sure it was a while.

Hang out with the Asians for a bit, then head home to watch {Proof}, was not a good film for a recently diagnosed bipolar who had been drinking most of the day. Really made me start questioning my sanity, although I did enjoy the film.

Well since I am getting paid, I guess I should get back to work.

On-On

Sluts Birthday

2006-11-11T10:57:00.000-08:00

Last night after work, picked up C'em Cummin and went straight to Laura's house. She was throwing Slut a birthday party. She had Maudie's cater it. Food was wonderful, free drinks even better, although the girl serving the drinks was pretty cute, so I pretty much tipped what I would have spent had I been out. We played Slut trivia, the contestants were Lovebite, Social Retard and Bitch, James Bitch. Think Lovebite won, was not paying attention. Next on the agenda, gifts. Lots of whiskey, lots of gag gifts, Laura saved hers for last an image of Trish Murphy . As an extra special gift, Trish Murphy walked out guitar in hand and started playing happy birthday. For those who don't know, Trish is Slut's favorite musician. She played a full set for us, afterwards she had a few drinks and jammed with some of the guitar players in the group. This party completely rocked, it was like something out of a movie. Picture's will follow once TAF emails them to me.

That's all for now kiddo's, off to the curry cook off.

On-On

Here are some pics, the first one is for Browneye since he said there was no way Trish would show up at the party. Additional pics can be seen here http://www.flickr.com/photos/tonyandbarb/sets/72157594370627968/

Ashamed

2006-11-07T18:10:00.000-08:00

Was just sending a text message and found out my phone does not know the word whore. WTF?

Speaking of WTF, check out Late Night's Blog and click on Meat Gazer under Colorado Hashers, not work friendly.

If you cannot tell, the old Timmy may be back.

Heard about an old friend

2006-11-07T17:25:00.000-08:00

So I thought I would post a pic of us.

Freak Out

2006-11-07T17:12:00.000-08:00

Today I may have completely freaked out a co-worker. I was in another building washing my hands and this guy walks out of one of the stalls and I comment that he had a tremendous dookie. I finish washing and drying my hands then I leave. The whole time the guy is frozen, his eyes were like those of a deer in a spotlight.

In all honesty, the guy let rip one of the most rancid smells I have ever come across. It was a triple flusher. And even the owner of the poop was gagging, that says a lot. I felt that this guy should know that he had truly taken the poop of a grand master.

Oh is it time for happy hour yet? Wait, I already had a couple of drinks 2 hours ago, 1 more hour till I can leave for good. Love my job! For reals!

Bipolar

2006-11-03T13:27:00.000-08:00

A good deal of you know that recently I was diagnosed with Bipolar Type 2, for those of you who don't, this is my big coming out party (no Browneye, not that kind of coming out party, so stop shaking your ass around). Most people freak out when they are diagnosed, I was somewhat accepting of it, since I knew with treatment, I could llive a happier life. Of course, on a daily basis I have to face that if I don't follow my treatment, I could quickly ruin my life or worse. Not like it is any big deal, I just have to take pills, pay attention to how I feel and listen to you guys when you say I am actining like a nut.

There is a stigma concerning people with bipolar disorder, I would like to take a moment and try to erradicate that notion. It is a genetic disorder, it is something that we were born with, we received a gene from our family that made us more prone to have this disorder. I am not crazy, I am not going to run away from life and become homeless, I rarely ever hear any noises or halucinate (well sometimes when I drink), for all intents and purposes, I am a somewhat normal person, I just have mood swings.

Since seeking treatmment, I still have my wild outbursts of mania, sure mostly when I am drinking, but those are starting to decrease and they usually involve me coming up with some fantastic practical joke.

The only real problem I am having with my treatment is remembering to take my meds, for some silly reason they have me taking them right before I go to bed, I forget pretty often that I and my sleep behavior is as erratic as my moods. When I forget, I am a little off for a few days. Another problem is when I go out and spend the night at friends places and I don't get back to my place until really late in the day, I am a wreck for a few days, I am working on plans to make this occurance decrease.

I would like to say, I am not overly sensitive to me being bipolar. When people who know me ask me how I am doing, I usually respond, "Still Crazy." I know, I just said I'm not, but I don't want people to feel uncomfortable around me when they know. I have a pretty good sense of humor about this simply because I have ruined some wonderful relationships due to my erratic behavior, finally having this sense of calm is great. Maybe I will finally make a relationship work.

I would like to take a moment to thank my firends who already do know, most have pulled me aside and have asked if there is anything they can do, just knowing I have that network out there really helps.

Just so you guys know, I am not on a mood enhancer. I take something usually given to epilepcy patients. It has an assload of side effects, so thus the weight gain, the spacyness, tiredness (the return to caffeine to my life), and the hand tremors (no I am not an alcoholic, it is an actual reaction).

So if anyone has any questions, feel free to post here or email me offline. I am by no means an expert, but I do spend a lot of my days reading about it.

And as for my last post, if I would have received the news about the no go on the promotion in August, I would have probably needed to be checked into a hospital.

On-On to the Weekend

Just found out

2006-11-03T09:34:00.000-08:00

I did not get the promotion. Kind of disappointing, since I have worked on creating this position for the past two years. For a brief moment, I actually considered looking for a job outside of the company. Then I remembered how great it is to work here and the insurance really rocks/ See what happens when I actually show up to work on a Friday, should have slept in.

Friday

2006-10-31T11:39:00.000-08:00

Do I go to the Ben Fold's show at Stubbs or the Widespread Panic show at the Backyard? I am leaning towards Widespread, anyone in?

BRC and the weekend

2006-10-30T10:28:00.000-08:00

October is upon us again, which means The Burnet Road Challenge, The Drunkest Race in Texas. We had many repeat runners from last year, a few who had actually finished the previous race. I really do not remember much of the BRC, it will probably be posted in several other blogs. I did do the two beers per bar, plus the whiskey shot (possibly two) at Ginnys, I also added in a random beer check at The Brentwood Tavern and some jager at LaLa's. Who knows how much I had at the end, although my credit card was still at that bar the next day.
After the BRC, several of us went to Taco Cabana for some breakfast tacos to help with recovery. This was pretty much a blur, as was the trip to drop a few people off. I do remember being in the back of Bridget's car, seeing Grabber (our race director) staggering down Burnet, we had to coerce him into the car. We dropped him off at his truck, where he promised to sleep. At this point a few of us made it over to the Keever's to continue partying, but alas we all just passed out.
Day two consisted of waking up and those of us left at the Keever's ended up going to Kerby Lane to meet Rob and Lynn for breakfast. The guys started drinking and of course since we had to go pick up more cars from the start of the BRC, we came up with the idea of doing parts of the BRC all over again. Brilliant! Back to Billy's, then Poodle Dog, then Dart Bowl for beer, bowling and burgers. After bowling, the girls wanted to nap before the TX A&M game, at this point I decide I needed a shower, and my car, so Keever drops me by my place. After I nap, I wake up an hour into the A&M game. I decide to go pick up my credit card from the Canary Hut, while I was there the bartender mentioned something about something I did the night before. Of course I don't remember, so I grab my CC and dash. The rest of Saturday was pretty lame, went home, cooked dinner and read.
Sunday I am woken up by my cell phone ringing, seems like that occurs every Sunday. It is Free Meat, she wanted to remind me to mention the Halloween Party during announcements at the hash, she also threw out an invitation for some soup at Chon Som. A quick shower and I am off to CS for some Tom Kha (ahhhhhh).
On the way to the hash, I am almost crushed between a truck and a concrete embankment. I was basically pinned in where I could not break, all I could do is wail on my horn. The trucker woke up and moved back into his lane. ASSHOLE!
The hash was in South Austin, hate South Austin, my internal compass just does not work down there. The hares laid a great trail, 8.4 miles. I was FRB to both the beer check and the end, which was a first, I have been frb to both but never in the same hash.
After the hash, headed home for a little reading, after a quick stop into CS for some curry.

On a side note, was just at Chipotle, picking up some lunch. I believe I have never been in there when an employee was not eating. That must say something about the quality of their food.

As for today, 6.5 hours left in the Network Operations Center and then home for either movies or reading.

On-On

Boring Thursday

2006-10-20T14:18:00.000-07:00

So as usual, I have no plans for Thursday (right). Woke up late, really needed to sleep in. Had my car serviced and went straight to Rover's where I met Kastelic, The Body and Great Dane Pain. Consumed a few beverages and then had to battle traffic to make it to trivia with the Quaglino's and the Perez's. The Quaglino's have been away and have not had much time to hang out with them since their return, plus we always have fun playing NTN. If we make this a weekly thing, I expect to see Squeezin and Squeef make an appearance.

After Trivia, time for Chon Som, had to drop off some bowls for Vagitarian. While there, I run into Tornanalsoreass Rex, Just Nicole and some friend of theirs. They offer to meet for a drink later, little did I know that meant we would be shutting down the bar.

On-On to a quiet weekend (RIGHT)

David Blaine Humor

2006-10-16T16:14:00.000-07:00

Check out this video

Space Giants

2006-10-16T15:58:00.000-07:00

In my never ending quest to entertain myself at work, I spent the better part of the day hunting down a Japanese TV show from my childhood. Every few years, this show will pop into my head and I will do my best to find someone who has watched it or find some documentation about it. Every time I end in failure. Not today! Today I have discover the show was called Space Giants. Here are a few pics of the show. They may be able to explain why I have achieved my current level of dorkdom.

Weekend

2006-10-16T08:57:00.000-07:00

Saturday, after another 11.5 hour work day, met Jeff at Chon Som for some sushi. As usualy the food was yummy, tried a few things off the sushi menu I have not had before. While we were there, Bitch, James Bitch shows up with Hippie Swallow and thus the madness started. After Chon Som closed, I Pee Freely, B,JB, HS, Free Meat and myself head over to G's where we meet Strap-On Elvis. B,JB, S-OE and myself end up singing a Journey song, of course this was after a couple of Tuacas and a shot of Jager.

When G's closes time for some hot tubbing at B,JB's and S-OE's. I of course have no shorts so had to borrow some from S-OE, quite a funny picture indeed. At some point I pass out in (Massive)Slutslingers bed. Somewhere around noon on Sunday, he wakes me and takes me home (God I am such a whore). Quick shower and breakfast and I am off to the hash. Should have skipped it, since it really did suck ass, but I am so close to my 100 run mug. I don't know how scathing I should make hash trash, but seriously this was one of the worst trails I have ever been on, possibly even the worst.

Well time to get back to trying to look busy

Happy Birthday

2006-10-14T18:11:00.000-07:00

may i feel said he
(i'll squeal said she
just once said he)
it's fun said she

(may i touch said he
how much said she
a lot said he)
why not said she

(let's go said he
not too far said she
what's too far said he
where you are said she)

may i stay said he
(which way said she
like this said he
if you kiss said she

may i move said he
is it love said she)
if you're willing said he
(but you're killing said she

but it's life said he
but your wife said she
now said he)
ow said she

(tiptop said he
don't stop said she
oh no said he)
go slow said she

(cccome?said he
ummm said she)
you're divine!said he
(you are Mine said she)

Everyday I check this little widget that tells me what happened today in history, well today is ee cummings birthday. I never really understood his work until my Oral Interpretation teacher assigned me to read this poem with a girl in my class that I had some what been crushing over for quite some time. A few months back I made a post of the greatest kiss of all time, reading this poem with her led up to that kiss later in the afternoon. Thank you cummings and thank you Mrs. Jackson!

Wednesday

2006-10-13T09:33:00.000-07:00

Phone ringing, I answer it, "Where are you?" It's Free Meat. "I think I am on Hippie Swallow's couch." At this point I realize it is noon and I am pretty much wasting the day. Take off to my apartment so I can eat, shower and generally clean up. Get a chat from @ss Gagger, she is at Chon Som and wanting to hang out. Quick trip over there and we decide to hit the spa to swill wine and relax (I know it sounds gay, but kind of cool to have chics encouraging you to drink booze you brought in while they help you relax).
After the Spa, it is time for the ex-Perv happy hour. I know, I have never worked for Perv, but I have made a few of their happy hours. When we arrive, my roommate C'em Cummin is there along with Creamadonna. C'em was there to network, and Cream was there to provide overachiever support. Several hashers were there, by this time things are already starting to get blurry, geez only 6.
Strap-On Elvis gives @G a call and we are off to downtown for some Budweiser promotion, free beer and food. When we arrive (Massive) Slutslinger is there, we stumble around a few bars. At some point I remember either calling or receiving a call from Closet Freak, don't really remember the content. At some point Slut and I decide we have had enough to drink and take off. Of course there is that obligatory last beer. While having the "last beer" we hear a great band and decide to stay for the set, few more beers. At some point we leave and I get dropped off at Chon Som, where I nap for a couple of hours and then head home. Gotta love midweek!
Thursday consisted of working on a presentation all day; which I am giving today and it keeps getting pushed back.

On-On to the Weekend

Second Interview

2006-10-09T13:26:00.000-07:00

So I just finished my second interview for a new position here at the froot. I am really nervous about this interview, every other position I have interviewed for I have always been offered the job. I am usually really confident and at times even arrogant (who would have thought that about me). This time though, I was totally nervous. I don't even know why. Much of the position is taken from notes I had made about how to improve things. During the entire writing of the job rec, I was kept in the loop. The position itself, was only open for like five days and I was told when to go apply.

I guess maybe it is because I really want this position. I guess it is because during why entire life of having a job, this is the one position that is truly worthy of my skills (much like when Browneye finally received his coveted position as Jizz Mopper at Hard Hank's Manorama).

I guess it is time to stop worrying and start drinking.

On-On

Brass Monkey HHH

2006-10-09T09:19:00.000-07:00

Just read about this group on the hash-l. It seems this group now holds the record for the coldest hash, -40, gotta love the weather in Antarctica. They ran a not-quite naked hash (they were allowed to wear boots, gloves and a head band).

Hanging with the Kimchi's

2006-10-07T09:48:00.000-07:00

Tuesday night, after work, on my way to leave Austin, I stopped off at Chlamydia's going away dinner. What was going to be a quick stop over, turned into a couple of hours.

After that slight deviation from my plan, I call Wet Spot to let her know I will be late. She is okay with this and we simply meet at Bottles and Racks, have to love a bar whose acronym is BAR. After a few beers, some Tuaca and Jager, it is off to WS house for Steel Reserve. AHHH Malt Liquor.

Wednesday consisted off waking up about noonish, following WS's directions to Donnie The Retards place. Turns out the plane is late, so I meet DTR at his office and we drive to the airport together to go pick up the Colorado contingent. It was so heart warming to see Nuttin But Net and DTR finally reunited.

At this point it was time to hit up Specs for the keg, then the Home Depot for tubing for the pony keg. We arrive back at DTR's and quickly unload the gear and get the pony keg ready. While on the phone with Closet Freak, I hear what I could only imagine was the beer shooting out of the keg all over DTR. To my horror, my ears did not deceive me.

Well with the keg having issues, we quickly switched over to Brass Monkeys. At this point it all becomes a blur. We play Beirut. I discover I am pretty decent at this game, as long as Guns and Roses is not playing. Closet Freak showing up and eating guacamole in the middle of the night.

Thursday consisted of waking up around noon, calling everyone else pussies for still laying around and not hitting the keg. NBN finally decided to stop complaining about his pussy hurting and had a Brass Monkey. At this point MILF and Cotch Scratch Fever rrrr rrrr also partook of some libations. Still missing is DTR. Every so often he would come out of his room, look a little green and then return to the comfort and safety of his bedroom.

When we finally left, we went to some pizza place (someone help me out with the name, was trying to describe the eggrolls to a friend). From their we found a place to do some drunken go cart and bumper boats. I kicked everyone's ass at drunken go cart!

At this point things started getting blurry again, something about Texas Hold'em. Passing out and stealing NBN's bed (sorry to be such a shit). Five a.m. found me driving to Austin, thanks for the wake up call CSF rrrr rrrr. Needless to say the drive home sucked, did not even bother stopping at my apartment, went straight to work and went to one of the sleep rooms for an hour. When I woke up, I worked for about 30 minutes, then back to the sleep room. At this point I figured out I was useless and went home, to my bed. I missed my bed, slept most of the day away and then woke up to go work at Chon Som.

Sorry no pics, Aggie Gagger wussed out and did the whole work thing.

A history of rule in the Middle-East

2006-09-29T09:43:00.000-07:00

In ninety seconds learn who has controlled the Middle-East.

Flippy Cup

2006-09-29T08:50:00.000-07:00

So I have never played flippy cup. Being the dork that I am, had to see if I could find the rules online. Are these the rules you guys go by?

Bored

2006-09-26T11:36:00.000-07:00

So I decided to wikipedia, Brass Monkey. During my search, I found out it is also the name of a bar in Perth Australia. Road trip anyone? Perth is bidding for World Interhash 2008.

Good Day???

2006-09-25T10:56:00.000-07:00

How could it be a bad one? After meeting Vagitarian for lunch, I get in my car and Hall & Oates are on the radio, of course it would be Maneater. Considering some of the conversations Vag and I had during lunch, this song seemed highly appropriate. So On-On to a good day, although I do have a few decisions I need to make before tonight.

Drunken Noodles

2006-09-23T13:35:00.000-07:00

Last night, I headed to Chon Som for some Drunken Noodles. When I walked in Justin reminded me that when I was to try Drunken Noodles for the first time I was going to have a bottle of Boone's Farm. Well off to the neighboring conveniance store for some Boone's. When I arrived, something seemed more fitting, BRASS MONKEY's! Well then the madness ensued. I was soon Joined by @ss Gagger, who quickly ran off with my Brass Monkey, no need to worry loyal reader, I had it back in my hands within a few minutes.

On-On to Saturday

Surrounded by Hawaiians

2006-09-22T15:40:00.000-07:00

Everywhere I go they seem to be there. My neighbor at work, just moved to Austin from there, worse yet, he brought his family. I go down to Skishore's and the server there is one also. Hang out with the Houston hash... Hawaiians. Even in the safety of my beloved Chon Som, a server is a wannabe Hawaiian. It's a conspiracy I tell you, they have something about being the 50th state. We need to stop looking to the Menace in Great White North (don't get me started on Canadians) and start looking to the Pacific. I for one am not going to stand for it, I say we head to the North Shore, drink lots of beers and corrupt their ladies, who's with me?

Can you tell I am bored. I think this is my way of telling kumoniwannaleiya that she needs to post. It might help the whole hooverphonic thing she has going on with her blog.

On-On to the Weekend

Menus

2006-09-22T11:14:00.000-07:00

So the Asians finally posted their menus. Go take a look! And if you have not joined their Myspace, please do so and leave a comment on your favorite dish there. For you out of towners, come to Austin, have drinks, hash and try this place out.

Host

2006-09-20T12:41:00.000-07:00

Being the super duper hasher that I am, when asked by I Pee Freely and his sister-in-law Alisa if I would be host for the day, since Free Meat is out of town, I of course said yes. This morning, I arrived with enough time to memorize the specials for the day. Once we opened though, business was quite slow. So I texted a few hashers, who say I hardly ever work at my normal job, and of course no one shows. I give them the opportunity to ridicule me in public and they all pass. Maybe tonight will be different.

On my list of things to do today, add Chon Som to as many Wi-Fi hotspot pages as possible. Always good advertising to get people in for free internet. Plus have to run an errand and buy some flame retardant, funny that word makes me think of Browneye. Tonight, tie one on in good hasher fashion, of course aftwer playing host.

For those of you who know what has been going on outside of the blog, I have had two days in a row where I have been in a good mood, pretty much a great mood. Has been years since I have had two days in a row.

I have nothing more to say at the moment, but I am sure I will post something later tonight.

On-On to errands

Whoa, 9 days

2006-09-18T11:00:00.000-07:00

Nine days since my last post. Whatever should I discuss? Most of it has been covered on other blogs. High points would include:

Having to be designated driver for the Asians.
Making Free Meat drink in circle for still being drunk from the night before (I at least had an excuse since I never stopped drinking except for when I was asleep)
Getting my latest set of lab results back, liver still healthy (actually appears I have never drank before {new meds are bad for the liver, so have to go through constant testing}).
impromptu happy hour for Bridgett's birthday
planning X-mas/New Years trip to England, Scotland and Ireland (don't wuss out guys!)
Bridgett's birthday party
kidnapping the birthday girl from her own party to make her go do shots
Having Ass Gagger complain about me being wet when I was asleep (geez I had dried off enough)

I am sure there are many other high points, I just cannot recall them right now. For more information on the past nine days, visit @ss Gaggers blog, she actually posts events as they happen. Now she just needs to catch up on her laundry and all will be well in Gaggerland.

Tonight

2006-09-09T14:17:00.000-07:00

Tonight is IP Freely's birthday, so a bunch of us are meeting at Chon Som for dinner. I have noticed that most of the people who are going, usually drink pretty good wine, so I decided I would show up with a bottle of Boone's. I am going to drink it from the bottle wrapped in a paper bag, show those losers some real class.
Afterwards, we are going to Grafitti's for more beer and more celebrating. Tomorrow is the Junta Hash. Thank god I am not taking part in laying of the trail, I really need some sleep, way too many late nights recently. Hopefully I won't have to do too many down downs, there is a Thai Party tomorrow night and I want to be some what sober just in case some girl actually does wnat to talk to the lone white guy in the crowd. These parties usually last all night long, so I took Monday off as a precaution, although I do plan on coming into the office for at least a few hours. Speaking of office, back to work.
ON-ON to insobriety.

Coming Home

2006-09-08T08:51:00.000-07:00

When @ss Gagger and I landed, we discovered The Body waiting for me (she had brought her car to the airport). Quickly grabbed my luggage and headed to The Body's for a beer and to pick up my car. After that a quick trip home for a shower and a possible nap (skipped the nap, was in some serious need for some Thai food from Chon Som {Chon Som is a restaurant opened by IP Freely and Free Meat, hope this answers your question EZ Fag}). When I arrived, found that my new roommate C'em Cummin was already there. I cannot believe how much I missed the Tom Kha (Thai soup with cocanut milk. Very rich and yummy). Since I have returned, I have pretty much lived at Tom Kha. I show up for lunch, hang out through the day, working on the playlist on the iPod, taking pics of the place since we completed all the work on it, plus now I am taking pics of all the dishes before they are served.

A somewhat funny thing happened the other day, Bubbles and Whoreo came in (a couple of fellow Invihahsers) and they asked what I would recommend, since I eat there pretty much every day, I went into a spiel about the curry of the day and the sushi appetizer. I think they took my recommendation. Well i know if I ever have problems at the froot, I can always be a server at a Thai place.

Free Meat has been asking that I post my favorite dish on my blog. Last night Alisa had me count off my top 10, I think I made it to 7, let's see how I can do sober.
1. Tom Kha
2. Green Curry
3. Ka-Prow
4. Panang Curry
5. Yellow Curry
6. Tom Yum
7. Pad Thai
8. King Siad (something like that, think I am the only person to have ordered this so far).

Damn can't do 10. If you have eaten At Chon Som, please post your favorite dish and possibly why. Squeef hope to see a response from you on this.

Lazy

2006-09-08T08:46:00.000-07:00

Too lazy to post any of the details of CO Invihash, go to @ss Gaggers page for some pics. Although I must say pulling Brownies comforter out from under him, causing him to roll onto the floor was fun. Also giving the naked hash the key to his room. Plus @ss Gagger's intervention, all good times. Another highlight would be making a great new friend, hope to see her soon, because it was really great hanging out with her.
Inspired by the fun I had at invihash, I went ahead and rego'd for Interamerica's and have been trying to rego for Tex-Mex. Oh yeah totally forgot to pay Meat Gazer for COTEX, damn. Oh Well.

On-On to my first day of work in a week and a half.

FUN FUN FUN

2006-08-29T10:32:00.001-07:00

After trail on Sunday, I was pretty wiped out so I skipped the On-On-On and went to .... you guessed it Chon Som. I pretty much needed some soup and their Tom Kha is the best ever! I didn't stay till close like I normally do, but while I was hanging out there I received a wonderful comment from one of the servers who was off duty at the time. This 17 year old girl said that there was no way I could be over 25, hearing stuff like that makes me feel great. I feel that I still look young, but to actually hear it is nice.

Yesterday, I had a doctors appointment, so I took a vacation day from work, I had every intention of going in for a few hours (seriously). While having lunch with C'em Cummin, Bitch, James Bitch and (Massive) Slut Slinger I some how get talked into skipping work and going to see Beerfest. Unfortunately that never panned out, Slut went back to work. C'em had an errand pop up and Bitch was called into a meeting. So I fell into some nap time (seriously needed it).

When I woke up, I discover the Fed Ex guy had come by and left a package, check from etrade for fun in Colorado. When I arrived at the bank, the teller informs me the check will be on hold till the 6th. What kind of BS is that? So off to a check cashing place, a loss of $30 and then back to the bank with a cash deposit.

The plan was to go see Beerfest last night, but Strap-On Elvis invited Bitch, Slut and myself to some party Budweiser was throwing for the service industry, who can pass up free drinks Sorry to bail at the last minute @ss Gagger. Of course I cannot drink much since I had to have blood work done the following morning, being the brilliant hasher that I am, I come up with the idea to have my blood work done right before I go to the airport on Wednesday. This idea though, does not get me out of being designated driver. Elvis and Slut had done this for me countless times, so time for me to catch up. We had a pretty good time. Afterwards we head over to Pluckers to harass the staff there. While there, the manager recognized me from when I lived in central (I use to harass him on a weekly basis back then).

This morning woke up on Slut's couch with enough time to go home shower and make it to work right on time. I am not for sure how much time I will put in today, really exhausted and need to double check everything I packed.

Here's to drinking at high altitudes after having massive amount of blood drawn.
On-On to Colorado Invihash

Last Night

2006-08-26T13:09:00.000-07:00

After work I headed over to Chon Som, I had to go help clean up the music on the iPod, plus I really wanted some soup. When I arrived, I see hashers everywhere it was like some giant On-In, except everyone was dressed for dinner. It was really great bouncing from table to table, having drinks with a few people I had not seen in a while, all in all a great time.
I really believe everyone who attended last night were thoroughly impressed. Over on Squeefs blog he wrote a nice little review of last night.
As the night drew on, the hashers broke up into two groups, some headed to Grafitti's and the other group headed to Tuck It's and DBD's house. I of course stayed at Chon Som because I had to work on the iPod after they closed, plus I had to be in the office today at 9:30, so I wanted to make it an early night. Of course, as usual, my plans went awry. After cleaning up 3 gigs of crap on the iPod and finally coming up with a decent playlist that sets the mood they want to provide, I ended up staying and drinking with the Asians till 4:30. It has been way too long since we pulled a late night drinking session, wait I was there till 2:30 on Thursday, wait, we all went out drinking and closed down the bars on Wednesday. Well anyhoo, quality time with the Asians is always great. I have really missed hanging out with them over the past few months. Well back to work, if you can call it that.
On-On

love fark!

2006-08-26T10:43:00.000-07:00

So as usual, surfing fark while at work. They have a pic you are supposed to photoshop. Well some hasher obviously found it before I did.

Thursday

2006-08-18T11:14:00.000-07:00

So on Thursday I did the normal routine, drinks at Rovers. While at Rovers, found out it was Kastelic's birthday, just seems like a few months ago we had been talking about going to Mexico for his birthday, guess it has been a year. I think we ended up throwing him a future party last year (I think going to Mexico with a dead hooker in the trunk would have been a lot more fun). After Rover's, we all headed over to Andiamo, to treat the birthday boy to dinner. Normally this is one of my favorite places to eat, but last night it was just off. I won't go into too great of detail, but I was very disappointed. After dinner, headed over to Chon Som to deliver an ipod, once I arrived I found out I neded to load the ipod also. In true Asian fashion, ended up hanging out there till midnight. All-in-all yesterday, I drank quite a bit, 4 beers at Rover's, wine and a Peroni at Andiamo, and who knows how many Lone Stars at Chon Som. Of course when I get home, I was not quite sleepy so out comes the tequila, needless to say I had a hard time waking up this morning.

So, it's Friday, what does everyone have going on?

On-On to Friday Night

Tim

2006-08-16T12:10:00.000-07:00

It is funny how easily it is to revert back to old bad habits. Trish and I break up and I go through a couple days of being weak, of whining, of basically being a puss. Yesterday while at work, I made a decision to be the guy a used to be. The guy I was before I came to Austin.

I gave Slut a call and had him meet me for a few drinks, at which time I announce my plan, to be the old me. I don't think I said it in that many words, but I had already planned to buy a can of snuff, which was a major part of the old me.

I dipped through jr high and high school. One of my golf pictures was removed from my high school year book because I was in mid swing, a beautiful swing I might add, but I had a huge amount of spit coming out of my mouth (and a beer can at my feet :) ).

Since I came to Austin, the only time I have dipped was when Todd was sick. Guess it was my way to cope, but even then it made me sick and I could only keep it in for a few minutes and I would end up puking. Last night I dipped for a couple of hours with no problem. Today, I am dipping with no problem. I never thought I would do this again.

When Justin died, I had no problem with Trish starting to smoke again, I understood. Sure I wanted her to quit after a while, and I even pushed her to, but she was not ready. Now I see, I am weaker than she is because I am reverting to a habit I have not had in four years.

Today, I want to play golf. I was totally through with golf, because I don't like the old me. That guy was prick, a snob. And here I am, turning back into that guy. Funny how defense mechanisms work. There is a lot of stuff I left behind when I moved here. Well the old Tim was tough. The old Tim, never took shit from anyone. The old Tim would belittle someone and when they were beaten mentally, would beat the crap out of them. Sunday, I felt the old Tim coming back, I wanted to take a swing at someone at hash. I have to keep that in check, I am sure it won't be as easy to get out of trouble in Austin as it was in Fort Worth.

So here I sit, watching a movie, snuff in my mouth. Oddly enough the movie is about someone reverting to their past (A History of Violence). I don't want to be the old me, I like being Timmy; but being Timmy means you let people in which gets you hurt. Tim means never letting anyone in. I have had some breakups since I have been in Austin; but I have never been this wounded. I could blame the Asians for this, they really taught me to be myself. They taught me to allow people to come in. I did that with Trish and I was comfortable with who I was with her. Maybe a few days of the old Tim will be good, it will get me through the initial pain of the break up. It will get me through calling her a million times a day. Last night I knew to give Raf my phone and my keys for safe keeping, so I would not call her in the middle of the night. By the way, I don't really blame the Asians, I am thankful for what they taught me. That is why they are family.

Part of being the old Tim is picking up girls and pretty much treating them like shit, I don't think I will do that. Last night I was glad I that I had deleted a lot of girls numbers out of my phone when I was with Trish. Sure there are some hashers numbers I have in my phone, but I respect the friendships we have made since we had stopped dating to have called them. Don't want to use my friends as booty calls.

Well at least the old Tim is better with work. I really rock at my job. But over the last two days, I have pushed the fact that my promotion which is on hold because of the freeze is really needed. Two days straight I asserted myself into that position. I am sure it will be noticed and I am sure when people get back from Cupertino I will be questioned about it. I have my reasons for doing it and will be able to defend my actions quite easily.

So again here I sit with a lot of decisions to make. I do know I want Trish back. I do know my being weak right now will not help with that. So hopefully I can find some middle ground between Tim and Timothy.

I do know I want to hash more than I have been. It really felt good running, it felt good to sing again. I had once threatened to quit the froot because they had scheduled me to work on a hashing day for two months. The combination of running, solving checks, singing songs and being completely relaxed with a group of people is heavily therapeutic. I have said many times that hashing keeps me sane and in a time when I am seeing both a psychologist and a psychiatrist, I could use a little sanity.

Well it is not quite 2:00 and I have finished all my errands and chores for the day, except for two. Those two are both phone calls so I will make them shortly. Then it is beer thirty.

I would like to say this, I have had the intentions of marrying five girls. Four of them, I really don't count. I did it mainly to shut them up. With Trish, I made a real commitment, talking to her family was something I would never have done with the others. I do love her, but I guess I have to deal with the fact that we most likely will never get back together, but one can hope.

Enough of this, not really whining just trying to get things straight in my head.

On-On to the Newcastle in my fridge.

Stupid Act?

2006-08-15T09:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I announced to the rest of the Junta that I would be running for On-Sec again. How stupid of an act was this, another year of being on mis-management. Well it is not like I do much, write the hash trash, skip most of the meetings, when I do show up I am usually late. But alas we are not hosting an event next year like we did this year, so should be cake.

On-On to Erections
why the hell am I thinking about this already, not even close to November.

Ads from the 50's

2006-08-07T08:30:00.000-07:00

I was checking out this web site, that has ads from the fifties. Some of these are pretty cool, and some are pretty scary. Ahh the fifties, back when America was wholesome.

Check out the grill.

Wonder what this kid grew up to be?

For all those hippie Austin Vegans.

A bunch of middle class white people drinking quarts of beer, hells yeah.

Notice all the Schlitz. And isn't that Puke Thief trying to score some?

Holy Crap!

2006-08-01T15:45:00.000-07:00

So some of you know, I have a favorite homeless person, because his signs are the funniest. While surfing today, I came across this pic. Some of you will recognize the sign, damn. Not going to give the guy on Parmer and MOPAC money anymore.

Hola

2006-08-01T10:26:00.000-07:00

So I may be feeling somewhat prolific today, so if I post too much my apologies. During lunch, I ran buy Chon Som, I feel really bad about not making it out there to help out, but I have had a lot of stuff going on; but still I feel like a bad son. The Asians and crew have done an awesome job on the place, I can barely recognize it anymore. Since the painting is finished, and I don't have to worry about the fumes affecting my affliction of constantly having migraines, I am going to make it out tomorrow. Of course I will only be able to stay a few hours, because going to go try and hit up sushi happy hour, maybe I will be able to swing back by afterwards.

I have had this song stuck in my head since going with Trish and Pornarotti to their family reunion. Some of you have received various lyrics from it as a text message, well now it is time to share all the lyrics with everyone. I like this song so much, it might replace Tubthumping as my ringtone. A Lap Dance is Always Better When the Stripper is Crying, by the Bloodhound Gang.

I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops.
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips,
milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
name was Russell.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave",
this pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that's a coincidence darlin',
‘cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer."
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern,
and I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask
as I do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
‘Course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole
with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something
resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean.
Got to nail her back at her trailer.
Heh. That rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch,
gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop.
There I was browsin' through the latest issue of "Throb",
when I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did I say that out loud?

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Colorado Invihash

2006-08-01T08:46:00.000-07:00

Trish's classes start the week we are leaving for interhash, so I have a rego up for sale. I offered it to Pornarotti, but he wussed out, somthing about being in the Navy. Four letters, A.W.O.L. LOSER! So if anyone needs a rego, let me know. Also if you plan on flying out of Austin into Colorado Springs, I have an extra ticket. Oh yeah, I need a roommate now. @ss Gagger? Elvis you get your rego yet?

Now on to the topic of me missing the last two hashes, I know I have never skipped 2 Sunday Hashes in a row, but hey it had to be done (I am super sorry that I missed Vag's tamales, damn I am sorry, god, Vag can you make me some pretty please :P ). I was actually thinking of skipping a few more and being a 6 week wanker for the first time ever, but hey too many good trails coming up, so guess that is not going to happen. Plus I need my 100 run mug! Also, I have to see how Elvis is going to SNAFU the Elvis run (come on try your hand at a live lay again) and what @ss Gagger will do for her analvarsary trail. Guess I need to show up, so we can actually have a hash trash, although Ring Around the Panty did write something for last week, but he never posted it. WANKER!

Anyone intrested co-haring the October Full Moon with me, please send me an email. Since October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I had something extra special in mind. This will probably be the last trail I hare this year (right). Oh yeah, I want to do a live trail for the full moon also, but not for October.

Okay, I am done rambling, have not put anything hash related in this in quite a while, guess I will go do a down down during lunch. Well back to trying to look busy.

On-On to something or other

HelloVader

2006-07-31T10:38:00.000-07:00

Saw this and had to share.

Baptism

2006-07-26T11:58:00.000-07:00

Last week, Trish and I made the trip to my home town to participate in the Baptism of my cousin Amy's son Tegan. I am the Godfather, thus the reason why I am holding him during the ceremony. Here are a few pics from the trip.

blASSt Zone's bday party

2006-07-15T12:05:00.000-07:00

When I arrived home last night, I found Trish and Pornarotti at my place, playing 3 man, definitely a good way to start the weekend. After a few beers, we headed to the party. The party was a blaASSt, lots of beer pong and singing, what more could a hasher ask for. At some point I remember doing Jager shots, ahhh Jager. This morning I woke up, still quite drunk hating the fact that I had to go into the office. Once in the office, I decided some power naps would help, they did. Around 11, one of my neighbors stopped by my desk and said I looked like a wreck, of course I looked like a wreck, I spent over an hour sleeping under my desk (some asshole was in the sleep room, even though I have a standing reservation for every saturday at 10 am). I struggled through to lunch, headed home and in true hasher nature, I grabbed a Bass and bit the bitch that had bitten me the night before. After a couple of beers and a shower, I feel like a new man, totally ready to finish the day, that is until the buzz wears off.

On-On to Just Jaime's bday

Birthday Hash 2006

2006-07-11T13:07:00.000-07:00

For once, I finished laying trail with enough time to eat, shower, change clothes and have a few drinks. This year, the drinks of choice would be Sparks and Mexican Martini's, a great combination to make sure a drunken hare can go the distance.

At the start, some people were discouraging drinking before the hash, since some hares had complained about running out of beer too early in the trail, I of course did not agree with this fully, I basically said that if you have hared this year, feel free to imbibe, since I was more than well stocked for the hash. I of course had a few to make sure those who were drinking were in good company. By the end of circle, I of course, was working on being hammered. Three beer checks and being the hare will do that to a guy.

For the On-On-On, we all headed to the hideout. This was one of the largest On-On-On's outside of someone's house I have seen in a while, even Crusty Beaver showed up. Things were going okay, I was trying to keep in mind that I did have to work the next day, then She Mussel Bitch showed up with Jager. Well not to be out done by her, I went and ordered some. Then I ordered more, then I ordered more and one for Crusty Beaver and She Wanker. Also early on, I asked for a rum and Diet Coke, Damon (Happy Crack) style. Needless to say when I left The Hideout I was ripped.

At Trish's urging, during the one block trip home, we pulled into Exxon for chili dog's. Nothing like chili dogs to make sure you have a nice settled stomach for work, right. If Monday was not my easy day at work, I would have called out sick. I showed up for work, on time; but I did end up leaving early. I felt like I would have been much better off if I would have pulled a Browneye and ended up puking all the Jager, but I toughed it out and paid for it the next day.

On-On to rehab (wait, I'm not a quitter)

First Super Cool B Day Present

2006-07-06T09:40:00.000-07:00

You can beat up a duck.

You can whip the devil.

You might even be able to take out a ninja.

But nobody, and I do mean nobody, can take out the ninja devil duck.

Thank you Trish for being the best girlfriend.

My Weekend

2006-07-03T11:57:00.000-07:00

My weekend was not mine at all, it pretty much belonged to Trish. Thursday started with Kevin visiting and then a happy hour, okay so this part really wasn't Trish, if Kevin had come into town I would have thrown him a happy hour even if I were not dating Trish. Friday, Trish and I wake up, as usual, we are late. So we quickly pack, get provisions for the trip, meet up with Kevin and it is off to Uvalde for their family reunion. The drive was pretty uneventful, well except for me wanting to stop every 20 minutes to play 3 man. When we finally arrived, we completed a 21 beer pyramid in around an hour and a half, was a pretty decent game for 3 people.After the game, we headed to the Lonestar for some beers, dancing and to see their family. Beer was cold, I suck at dancing, so the game started anew. After the game, it was back to the hotel to sneak in the pool. We were only able to swim for about 20 minutes before being kicked out. What makes it funny is that the swimmers were Trish, her mom and myself. Pretty funny seeing Trish's mom scale a fence to swim.

Saturday, we headed over to Trish's families place outside of Uvalde, pretty much we had a marathon game of 3 man, that I eventually quit (yes Kevin, I am a pussy). After I quit, I found Trish and napped for a few hours. When we woke up, I rejoined the game, somehow Kevin was still able to sit in a chair. At one point while I was still sober, I cornered Trish's father and asked his permission to marry her. He said it was okay, guess everyone knew I would ask eventually. Saturday night was a somewhat early evening, we were all pretty exhausted from being outside drinking all day, plus we had an all day event on Sunday.

Sunday, we woke up and packed the car and headed to San Antonio for the Warp Tour. This is something Trish has been going to for the past 4 years. To say I felt a little out of place is the understatement of the year. I felt like I was at some Junio High dance and I was a chaperone, not because of Trish's age but because the majority of the people there are younger than she is. The day was not all horrible, Helmet played, have not seen them since undergrad, they were a band I really liked when I was 20. Since they are one of the loudest touring bands around, I stopped feeling old. Reason being is that saying, if it is too loud then you are too old. They are super loud and I loved it. Now one would ask, would I ever do Warp Tour again, since I was miserable most of the day, the answer is yes. I found a band I liked that I had never heard before and I got to see a band that used to be pretty important to me. But here is the kicker, when Trish really gets into the music, she gets this innocent, sweet little smile. I saw that smile a hundred times yesterday, I would go back just to see her smile just once.

We left Warp early and headed back to Austin, we met up with one of Kevin's Navy friends at The Hideout, had a couple of drinks and then called it a night. Today, I am at work and Kevin and Trish are at Schlitterban. I would say life sucks, but i have been off since last Tuesday, and after Today I will not work again till Saturday.
I might throw a HH on Thursday for my bday,will send out an evite if I do.

ON-ON to the COB

Me and Trish

2006-06-27T15:52:00.000-07:00

This is from Sunday's On-On-On.

Hate

2006-06-23T13:46:00.000-07:00

I kind of hate everything today. Wish this day would be over. Nothing bad happened, I am just in a sour mood and cannot wait till I get out of here in 5 hours.

Addendum:
I have no idea why i am in a bad mood, work is going well, nothing really annoying happened. I am in love with a great person and always look forward to seeing or hearing from her. My disposition is just sour today, the wierd thing is my co-workers are not noticing it, they usually stay clear of me on days like this. Going to try and cust out of here in a couple of hours. Maybe that will help, just want to go home and lay down for a bit or maybe go run for a few hours.

I Love the 80's

2006-06-20T11:53:00.000-07:00

So I was just sent a link to check out. It is a collection of music videos. Check it out, a lot of memories there.

I am thinking about a new hobby, this might be a fun activity for when I am in Colorado in September. Or at least it will make for some interesting hashing.

Asian's Place

2006-06-16T10:15:00.000-07:00

So the last few days, I have been spending my free time over at the Asian's new restaurant helping them. This is really exciting, especially since Nat and Marisa are the closest thing I have to family in Austin, excluding Trish of course. It is invigorating to be part of the creation process of something that has been there dream for so long. This also inspires me to get off my duff and really start working on opening my own place. So maybe that is a project Trish and I can start working on soon, some of the people who have been helping, have offered to help me too. So Fish, get off your ASS and do it!

time to act like I am actually working again.

Self-Imposed Exile

2006-06-13T12:45:00.000-07:00

I am temporarily putting myself into a self-exile. I am pretty much going to be staying in, watching movies and reading. I have had a lot of things on my mind lately and have not been dealing with them well. Lately when I go out, I pretty much either want to leave immediately or get shitty drunk. I know, what is wrong with getting shitty drunk, fish you're famous for it. Well, usually when I get shitty drunk it just happens and I have no intention of it, now I just want to do it all the time. I am not exiling myself because of fear of drinking, I will be have a couple of beers while I read. I just really need some time away. If I do go out in the coming weeks, it will only be to help people out. So I will go work at the Asians place if they need me, if any of you guys need something I will always be here, I am just tired of partying. See you all at my birthday hash in a few weeks.

DOF

Sunday's trail

2006-06-12T10:51:00.000-07:00

Trail# 1222 (June 11, 2006)
Trail: 1222 Free At Last Redemption Trail
Hares: 4 Day Old Fish, Pork My Pussy, Ring Around The Panty, Just PMP's Mom
Start: 3:01pm Georgetown Recreation Center
BeerCheck: #1 Blue Hole Park
BeerCheck: #2 Chautauqua Park
BeerCheck: #3 988 I-35 North
End: 4:54pm San Gabriel Park
Miles: 4.6
Temp in Circle: 99�F
Pack: 33
Visitors: 5 Ass Carnage (Hill Country H3), Balled Guy (Tuscon H3), Bibubbleyum (Guam H3), Chlamydia (Brokeback Mountain H3), Texas Bullshitter (Penang H3)
New Boots: 0
Six Week Wankers: 1 Prozac (7wks)
Trail Wankers: 1
Awards: 1 Just PMP's Mom=1st Lay

Trails 31
Longest Trail 9.6 miles Tuck It Up The Butt, Death By Dildo, Strap-on Elvis, Ass Carnage, Day Old Fish, Pork My Pussy
8.4 miles (Massive) Slut Slinger, Day Old Fish
7.6 miles blASSt Zone, Cumonawanalaya, Father Syphilis, Free Meat, I Pee Freely
Shortest Trail 1.8 miles Tuck It Up The Butt, Death By Dildo, Strap-on Elvis, Ass Carnage, Day Old Fish, Pork My Pussy
3.4 miles Sphincter Blinker, Bitch, James Bitch!, Hippie Swallow, Speedie Edie, blASSt Zone, Free Meat, I Pee Freely
3.5 miles Speedie Edie, The Body, Try A Fuck (TAF)
Largest Pack 59 Sphincter Blinker, Bitch, James Bitch!, Hippie Swallow, Speedie Edie, blASSt Zone, Free Meat, I Pee Freely
58 Brownie, She Mussel Bitch, SmegmaBalls, Death By Dildo, Tuck It Up The Butt, Pumper Up The Butt, The Body, Batguano Man
57 Social Retard, Easy Access
Average Trail 5.2 miles The trails will be in the range 3.6-6.8 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack 40 The packs will be in the range 30-50 on 68% of the trails.
Average Attendance 22%
Average Trail (2005) 5.5 miles The trails were in the range 3.7-7.3 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2005) 40 The packs were in the range 27-53 on 68% of the trails.
Active Hashers 140 60% Harriers, 40% Harriettes
Inactive Hashers 421
Six-Week Wankers 44 Average Weeks Wanking= 16
NFHN25
Visitors55
New Boots 46 And 29 were frightened away by the experience!

Hashing is my life! High Beams 97%
The Body 97%
Day Old Fish 90%

Most Profilic Hares (# of trails hared)
Death By Dildo 5 1193,1195,1201,1210,1215
Day Old Fish 5 1202,1208,1215,1220,1222
Tuck It Up The Butt 4 1193,1195,1201,1215
C'em Cummin 4 1194,1197,1208,1220
Try A Fuck (TAF) 4 1194,1198,1199,1212
The Body 4 1195,1197,1199,1207
Social Retard 3 1192,1203,1209
blASSt Zone 3 1204,1212,1221
She Mussel Bitch 3 1195,1198,1208

Most enthusiastic New Boots (% attendance since first trail)
Pork My Pussy 63%

Awards Earned (Active Hashers Only)
666-999 Trails 1 Crusty Beaver
500-665 Trails 3 Ram Rod, She Mussel Bitch, Sperm Bank
250-499 Trails 10 Big Bloody Ketchup, Blow Hole, Cherry Popper, Meat Between The Teeth, Mr. Pib, My Ingrown Testicle, Organ Grinder, Pumper Up The Butt, SmegmaBalls, The Body
100-249 Trails 24 (Massive) Slut Slinger, A Bill Named Sue, Cadaver Diver, Crotch Rot, Easy Access, El Smeets, Father Syphilis, Free Meat, Glow Worm, High Beams, I Pee Freely, Itchy Hole, Jug Tugger, Just Head, Love Bite, Smut Mutt, Social Retard, Squeef, Squeezin' Semen, Stay Free With Wings, Swalamander, Try A Fuck (TAF), Unzip Me, Wicked Itch of the Yeast
69-99 Trails 7 Creamadonna, Day Old Fish, Death By Dildo, Fuck U Knave, Home Alone, Pork Pushing Pimp, Tuck It Up The Butt

Sappy

2006-06-09T14:40:00.000-07:00

I received a message from Trish today, it basically said most of the reasons why she loves me. It really took my breath away to read it. I really love that girl. Trash talkers flame away, but remember this, when you're at home all alone, I will be with a wonderful girl.

Happy Birthday G.O.T.A.

2006-06-09T08:08:00.000-07:00

Everyone tell Tuck It Happy Bday.

Whichwich?

2006-06-02T15:58:00.000-07:00

So during the past week, Trish and I have been frequenting WhichWich. This is a really great sandwich shop. I know, i am supposed to be keeping Austin weird and supporting local shops, but geez Thundercloud gets old after a while. That and the whole having some punk rocker make your sandwich thing is getting pretty lame. I know I have been hit up for money on 6th by a kid who made my sandwich earlier in the day at Thundercloud. And it is not like WhichWich is some huge chain, it started in Dallas basically in an area I used to hang out at. The sandwiches are pretty inexpensive, they are super good and the way you order leaves no room for error. I definitely suggest this as a good lunch or evening sandwich shop. Only downside is they are super busy at lunch time, yes they have been open for just a few weeks, but their superior sandwiches have already instilled a loyal following.

And if you are still hungry, there is a good kolache spot right next door, Lone Star. Another really good place and i t is locally owned. Tried this out the other day and I am definitely going back, plus they have the fruit kolaches, need to take some of these to Trish's mom in order to bribe her to get my mug back. She is definitely a hasher parent, at least my mug is not in a block of ice, foiled again Pornarotti. Give these places a try the next time you are near Parmer and Metric.
Till Next Time

Have not posted in a while

2006-05-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to drop a line to say I am still here. I know I see most of you at hashes, HH's and parties. This week has been very confusing, I cannot imagine how it is for Trish, Kevin and their family. I have a lot to say, but the words are just not there. Maybe someday I will write about it, maybe I won't. I dunno.

I would like to share a little story I heard this week. A guy was explaining what happened to his false teeth. He was passed out on the couch drunk and he hears this noise like his pitt bull is chewing on a bone. When he gets up, it turns out his pitt bull was eating his teeth. If you could have saw the guy and the way he was telling the story it was quite funny.

I would like to close by saying that Trish's parents took us out for dinner last night. I made the suggestion that they keep it a family thing and Trish's mom insisted I go. Considering what they have gone through this week, I was very touched. It made me happy to see her mom smiling and in a good mood all during dinner. I know the sad times will always be there because of her loss, but that little bit of happiness was, well I don't know how to explain it.

Mom and Yvette, if you are reading this, I love you both. And I am planning on making it up there sometime soon. I know I am always say that, but I am serious this time and not just because my birthday is coming up.

Undergrads

2006-05-20T10:24:00.000-07:00

Some of you may have already seen this on a post on myspace, sorry. The creator of the show Undergrads has started a myspace profile. This profile is to show that there is an interest in creating a second season of the show. For those of you who have not watched the shor, it is really intelligent and funny. This show deserves a second season. For those of you in Austin, I have the first season on DVD and would be willing to loan it out. Trish and Ring Around the Panty can tell you how funny this show is. So give the show a chance, if you have a myspace account, add them as a friend.

Great Day

2006-05-13T12:15:00.000-07:00

So I was heading to lunch today, had settled for Vietnamese, then I remembered that Free Meat said there was a new Mexican place opening up near the Viet place. I decided to take a look, turns out it is the same place I used to go to lunch when the froot was at its previous location. Los Jaliscienses has come to North Austin. For those of you who have been there, you know this is one of the best Taqueria's in Austin. I would have to say that this is my favorite Mexican place in Austin and now to have it in my neighborhood makes things all the much better.

This place has this great poblano cream sauce, it goes great on everything. Their regualr salsa's are good but I just can't stay away from the green. My usual order there is the Alambres. It is like a fajita dish, but you also have bacon and sausage in it besides just the beef or shrimp. I really cannot begin to describe how good this place is. The only bad thing I forsee is most of their clientele are Mexican, something N Austin is short of. I urge everyone who reads this to give this place a try, the food is definitely worth it. If not for the food, then do it for me, I need this place for a lunch and dinner destination. They need the business so do it for me.

Quit reading this, go there now.

Good Movies

2006-05-13T10:31:00.000-07:00

Last night, Trish and I watched Before Sunrise, one of my favorite films. It was her first time to see the film and she really enjoyed it, she even insisted I move Before Sunset to the top of my Netflix list. I seriously hopes Linklater makes the third film soon, he waited 8 years between sunrise and sunset. I might even add Waking Life to my queue, since the characters of Jesse and Celine make an appearance in that film. This film uses the same animation technology that Linklater used in his new film A Scanner Darkly.

I have been thinking a lof about films lately and it has inspired me to finish a project I started about three years ago. I truly intend to actually finish my screenplay. Some of you out there have read what I have written thus far and have asked me to finish, but I keep putting it aside. After seeing so many great movies lately, I am motivated to try and leave my mark by actually filming this thing. As news comes, I will keep you posted. Anyone interested in reading it email me. Browneye can't read it because he is a Wanker.

New Blog

2006-05-12T13:36:00.000-07:00

Welcome Pork My Pussy .

Classic Movie Series

2006-05-12T08:28:00.000-07:00

The Paramount has released its list for the Summer Classic Series . This series is one of the things that make Austin what it is. There is nothing like seeing a Classic Film in a theater from that time period. Anyone interested in going, email me. There are quite a few shows I plan on attending. I went last year and had a blast, of course the company I had was part of the reason. A suggestion for places to eat afterward would have to include Thai Passion. For those of you I have dragged to Bankok Cuisine, it is the same owner.

New Blogger

2006-05-11T13:01:00.000-07:00

Everyone go give Pornarotti a warm blogger welcome.

Baseball

2006-05-09T13:39:00.000-07:00

Last night, I cut out of work early and headed over to Slut's. Strap-On had procured us some tickets to the Express game. We head over to Round Rock and pick up Strap-On, of course we stopped at The Pluck for a couple of 32oz beers. The game was pretty good, the Express really spanked Omaha. Plus it was dollar dog night. I cannot believe how long I have gone without ball park franks. We were discussing about having a hash outing to a game, they did a few years ago and got shirts and everything. On the way out of the game, Strap-On started talking about the song Greensleeves. He said he was surprised that there was not a hash song using that tune and that there should be. Well since I am not one to disappoint my friends:

Strap-On Elvis is a fag
who dines from a collostamy bag

Strap-On Elvis is a tool
requested this song therefore a fool

Everybody sing!

Crazy Dream

2006-05-08T08:45:00.000-07:00

At 7:30 this morning, the power went out in my apartment complex. My apartment started heating up and thus my dreams became quite weird. I dreamed I was at work and I was talking to some co-workers. For some reason they start sparring, but they are using a knife and something kind of like a large needle, and they are actually cutting each other. I then left for lunch, for some reason a group of us go to someone's house, at the house this girl is there and she sticks me with the needle like 5 times. I pass out. When I wake up, I run outside and my-corrkers who i had left with were waiting for me. We get back to work and I notice that I had massive whelps all over my face. I decide I need to find my manager to tell him I am going to the hospital, since it was kind of obvious I had been poisoned. While I am running around the office I run into The Body, Yasuko, and Great Dane Pain. For some reason they are at the Froot and they are all holding giant piles of shoes. I continue looking for my boss and I run into Trish, weird, she worked for the froot. I continue running and I come across C'em Cummin doing some sort of motivational speech. I finally run into my old manager, I ask him if he has seen my current manager and I tell him what is going on. He tells me to calm down and then tells me a story about him taking a dump and having explosive diarrhea. The poop bounced off the water and hit all over his ass cheeks, he thought his ass was damaged so without cleaning he ran into a ZVP's office to tell them he needed to go to the hospital. Hius point to this was that he over reacted from pooping himself. I try to make it clear that I am not over reacting but have been poisoned, at this point my alarm on my phone went off and I woke up. Whenever it is too warm or I have a fever, I have some crazy, psycho dreams. BTW, I saw the manager who was in the dream this morning and I just kind of looked away. So I don't care what this dream means, I would prefer not to know. But for some reason I felt compelled to post this. Enjoy.

2006-05-05T10:14:00.000-07:00

So this week has been going pretty much the same as previous weeks. Tuesday went to Trish's hockey game. I was pretty surprised by her skating, this game was the fastest I have ever seen her move in skates. I was some what impressed, although I am still faster than she is. Wednesday was also the usual stuff, cooked for Trish, met Marisa and Alisa for a beer at Rovers. This was cool, it has been way too long since I have had a Blue Moon Belgian. Thursday all I did was clean my place, and play Torn City all day. That night, we had a couple people over, I know what you are thinking, "Fish never has people over to his place." Well now that my place is clean and my old roomie gone, that is all going to change. So this weekend, at some point I am asking Trish's dad for permission to marry. I know, crazy, but hey. We are not getting married till next year right before Inter-America's. So far Best Man will be Free Meat and the Maid of Honor will be Pornerotti. So go ahead, tell me I am crazy.

Saturday

2006-04-29T15:55:00.000-07:00

Some words of wisdom to lead me into Saturday night ...

"It is essential to be drunk all the time. That's all: there's no other problem. If you do not want to feel the appalling weight of Time which breaks your shoulders and bends you to the ground, get drunk, and drunk again. What with? Wine, poetry, or being good, please yourself. But get drunk. And if now and then, on the steps of a palace, on the green grass of a ditch, in the glum loneliness of your room, you come to, your drunken state abated or dissolved, ask the wind, ask the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, ask all that runs away, all that groans, all that wheels, all that sings, all that speaks, what time it is; and the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, will tell you: 'It is time to get drunk!' If you do not want to be the martyred slaves of Time, get drunk, always get drunk! With wine, with poetry or with being good. As you please." Charles Baudelaire, 1866

Sing along time

2006-04-29T14:22:00.000-07:00

So very bored, so add some verses

Melody - The Candy Man
(Take turns leading verses)

Who will run through jaggers (who will run through jaggers),
Ripping up his flesh (ripping up his flesh),
And turn right around,
And repeat the bloody mess?
It's the S&M man.

CHORUS:
Oh, the S&M man,
The S&M man because he mixes it with love,
And makes the hurt feel good (Yes the hurt feel good)

Who can take a puppy,
Hold it by the ears,
Fuck it in the ass,
Until it sheds those puppy tears?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take two ice picks,
Stick one in each ear,
And ride her like a Harley,
While he roots her up the rear?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a vagina,
Suck out all the yeast,
Spit it out into some dough,
And serve bread at the hash feast?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a transient,
Rip out one of his eyes,
Skull fuck the bastard
While he listens to his cries?
It's the S&M man.

Who wears pants with zippers,
And no underwear,
Then pulls them up and down,
And rips out his pubic hair?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a razor,
And no shaving cream,
Scrape her pussy bald,
While he listens to her scream?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take an old saw,
Rusty but still cuts,
Pull it back and forth,
Until he rips off his own nuts?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a bottle,
Shove it up your ass,
Hit it with a hammer,
And line your ass with glass?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take your scrotum,
Stick it with a pin,
Hang on a bunch of weights,
Till it drags down to your shins?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take your penis,
Slam it in a door,
Slam it in a door,
So you can't fuck anymore?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a sander,
Make sure it's Black and Decker,
Rub it up and down,
Until you've got a bleeding pecker?
It's the S&M man.

Who would take a condom,
Put pepper in the ring,
Use it on the wife,
'Cause she twitches when it stings?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a mallet,
Claim that he's a stud,
Smash it on his pecker,
Till it starts to ooze blood?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take your penis,
Tie it in a knot,
Tie it in a knot,
Until the sucker rots?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take sandpaper,
Rough like fifty grit,
Rub it on her pussy,
Until she has no clit?
It's the S&M man.

Who takes jumper cables,
Clamps one on each tit,
Starts up the car,
And electrocutes the bitch?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a young girl,
Turn the lights down low,
Flip on the video camera,
And make like Rob Lowe?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a vice clamp,
Clamp it on a tit,
Squeeze the sucker down
Till it pops just like a zit?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a cheese grater,
Strap it to his arm,
Fist fuck the bitch
And make Vagina Parmesan?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take some shackles,
Chain you to the walls,
Fill a glass with sperm,
By lancing both your balls?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a Coke bottle,
Shove it up her ass,
Kidney punch the bitch,
Until she's shitting blood and glass?
It's the S&M man.

Who would use machinery,
To masturbate at work,
Rip off his left testis,
And pretend it didn't hurt?
It's the S&M man.

SONG ENDERS:
Who can take a baby,
Lay it on a bed,
Turn the bugger over,
Fuck the soft spot in its head?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a little girl,
Before she's on the rag,
Fuck her till she's dead
And then toss her in a bag?
It's the S&M man.

Who would put a kid's hand,
In a socket on the wall?
It's nice when they jerk,
Up against his balls.
It's the S&M man.

Who goes to the abortion clinic,
Sneaks around the back,
Digs through the dumpster,
Until he finds a tasty snack?
It's the S&M man.

Who gives children candy,
Takes them round the block,
And rips up their innards,
With the ramming of his cock?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a baby,
Throw it on a pile,
And fuck it up its ass,
Shis-ka-bob style?
It's the S&M man.

Who would take your kiddies,
Out to a picnic binge,
Put them on the fire,
And watch the fuckers singe?
It's the S&M man.

Who can take a pregnant woman,
Fuck her till she's dead,
Leave his dick inside her,
Till the foetus gives him head?
It's the S&M man.